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I <3 ZOMBIES
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
6:49PM - Equal rights.
Yeah, Atheists aren't discriminated against, not in this United States, no way, not here.
Fuck all of you.
Thursday, November 19, 2009
8:40AM - Politibleaaaaaaacccch
Hey, if you're a Palin supporter or a Teabagger, just go ahead and remove me fom your friends list, because it's a guaran-damn-tee that if you start going on again, I will be incapable of reading your thoughtless bullshit.
And hey, if you hate my thoughtless bullshit let me know so I can unfriend you as well. Don't want anyone to feel pressured here.
Thursday, November 5, 2009
11:00PM
If no one's ever written a break-up song called, "Hell's like Heaven 'cause you're not here," they should.
Tuesday, November 3, 2009
10:56AM - Why are atheists so ANGRY?
And I get angry when believers act as if these offenses aren't important, because "Not all believers act like that. I don't act like that." As if that fucking matters. This stuff is a major way that religion plays out in our world, and it makes me furious to hear religious believers try to minimize it because it's not how it happens to play out for them. It's like a white person responding to an African-American describing their experience of racism by saying, "But I'm not a racist." If you're not a racist, then can you shut the hell up for ten seconds and listen to the black people talk? And if you’re not bigoted against atheists and are sympathetic to us, then can you shut the hell up for ten seconds and let us tell you about what the world is like for us, without getting all defensive about how it's not your fault? When did this international conversation about atheism and religious oppression become all about you and your hurt feelings?
Read the rest here. She nails it everywhere, in every way, and much more eloquently than I ever could.
Friday, October 16, 2009
Friday, October 2, 2009
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
5:26PM - Miracle Boob!
Monday, August 31, 2009
10:43PM
YAY I have a paid account again! Shut up, y'all, I like to be able to edit my replies and other such bullschtick.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
11:50PM - Stuff
- Yogurt is not staving off the yeasties. I am going to try eating more yogurt. God, I hate yogurt.
- People scare me.
- Also, I hate people. Only really in general though.
- I am a really shitty friend because I don't actively stay in contact with people. Blecch.
- I have an appointment to see about my punctured eardrum - pardon me, tympanic membrane perforation - on Friday.
- Meanwhile, all high-pitched voices still sound like Daleks.
- Also, I'm mostly deaf in my right ear now, and it's really really really really fucking frustrating.
- There is no next li.
11:42AM
"...and try not to dwell on God standing over us with that giant shovel." AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!
(above link = video clip from "Malcolm in the Middle")
Sunday, August 23, 2009
3:57PM
I have an ear infection and a perforated eardrum. I have no idea how my eardrum was perforated. In my right ear every tone in a certain range and higher sounds dissonant. The speech of my children and almost every woman sounds like they're Daleks. It's really fucking with me and I hate it a lot.
I'm on antibiotics for the infection and choking down 2 tubs of yogurt every day to avoid the dreaded yeastie beasties. I'm calling an ear, nose and throat guy tomorrow about the perforation.
I am just really really low-intensity unhappy right now, but it's a constant thing. Fucking stupid ear.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
12:44AM - I HATE FIOS
I am getting sucked into.... America's Best Dance Crew. JUST FUCKING SHOOT ME.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Tuesday, August 11, 2009
9:19AM
You know, when I hear "death panel" I don't think "health care." I imagine a giant space ship or station with giant panels which open and unleash giant missile barrages or some such.
Mmmm. Spaceships.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
2:44PM
I figured out why, to me, deep Southern accent = automatic ignoramus. It's because most people who have left the South for any decent period of time gain a little bit of worldliness and lose a little bit of accent. The people whose accent are deepest seem least likely to have traveled beyond their little pigshit area, and most likely, therefore, to be fucking ignorant.
That's why it's tougher to pick out piss-ignorant Midwesterners from their accents.
Of course, this is not always true - there are people with deep Southern accents who are also well-read and equipped with curiosity....
But man, I hear a thick Jawjuh or Carruhlahner or Tayxus or Vuhginneeyuh accent and automatically deduct a cool 30 from their perceived IQ.
And anyone who's lived in the south for more than a few years knows that each of those state names were spelled in the vernacular of that state. Southern accents vary wildly. In parts of Appalachia, they almost sound like they're speaking Welsh, f'reals.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
11:41PM
- I know there are people out there who think marshmallows do not belong in cereal, and those people are WRONG.
- How sad is it that I mostly read the Fark politics discussions for the pics?
- Holy shit, it's back-to-school time already, when the hell did THAT happen?
- We have FiOS TV now. Um, woo?
- STILL SORTING THROUGH STUFF HOLY SHIT Y'ALL.
Thursday, July 30, 2009
10:35PM - Liszt
- Things being moved around effectively.
- Girl is in Roanoke with family and fucking has lice. Which she probably got here. But we can't find it anywhere else. WTF??? HATE LICE.
- Relative's best friend of 35 years died a couple of weeks ago.
- Same relative's daughter stole some of his guns (he deals in antiques and reproductions) which is a FEDERAL OFFENSE, YOU CUPID STUNT.
- Coffee fucking good.
- Oh yeah, and another friend's kid was diagnosed with Hodgkin's.
- Hence, the BAD THINGS STOP HAPPENING PLZmuthafuckinKTHX post.
- Cherries were on sale at Costco, and mmm.
- I will probably have the shits from hell tomorrow.
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
11:45PM
CAN BAD SHIT PLEASE STOP HAPPENING TO ME AND PEOPLE I KNOW NOW PLZKTHX? I MEAN I UNDERSTAND THAT THESE THINGS HAPPEN BUT MAYBE SPREADING THEM OUT A BIT WOULD HAVE BEEN MORE BEARABLE.
This post brought to you by the letter CAPS and the number LOCK.
Friday, July 17, 2009
7:17PM - Double-stuf.
Thank you to the folks who wished me happy b'day yesterday.
Last night my mother-in-law passed away.
So really, a mixed bag.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Friday, July 10, 2009
10:11AM
Someone mentioned this a couple of years ago, but I've seen it violated enough times lately to repeat it:
THE WORD "ASSLESS CHAPS" IS REDUNDANT. Chaps are assless. They only cover your legs and hips. If they covered your ass, they would be called "leather pants." The phrase "assless chaps" chaps my ass, which it could do with ease if I were wearing chaps BECAUSE THEY ARE, BY NATURE, ASSLESS.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
6:47PM
I went to help Tark today because our Little League field is hosting the regional 12-year-old All-Stars tournament and he friggin' volunteered to RUN IT. Anyhow, I got roped into announcing the first two games. You know, you tell each team when they get their 10 minutes of warm-up time, you introduce the teams by individual player, and every time a player comes to bat you announce his number name, etc. I tried to channel my inner Phil Hartman and actually had a pretty good time - tried to announce each kid as if he were in YANKEE STADIUM, YO.
So, right. Thing is, at the beginning of each game I introduce each of the players and the coaches and manager, and then read the Babe Ruth Baseball Code of Conduct, and then the people in the concession stand play the National Anthem (because that's where the main PA is located - about 50 yards from the scorebox) and then the game starts.
So I get through introducing the teams, and read the Code of Conduct, and use the walkie-talkie to tell the concession stand, "Ok, hit it."
They radio back, "Ok!"
[pause]
Me: "National Anthem time?!?"
Them: ".....garble!!"
The teams are standing on the baselines. Parents are all standing in the bleachers. Everyone has their hat/hand over their hearts, lookin' at the flag, and waiting. They start looking around, doing that, "WTF?" thing to each other, waiting for the music....
So I picked up the mic and I motherfucking sang the motherfucking National Anthem.
I. WIN. AT. LIFE.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
7:46PM
Is there EVER a situation for which a Ghostbusters quote is not appropriate? I really don't think so.
Monday, July 6, 2009
Thursday, July 2, 2009
4:23PM - Yearbook thing
I'd post my horrible, horrible yearbook photos like a bunch of y'all are, but my yearbooks are all in the workshop and totally fuckin' buried.
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
12:22PM
HEY, another great dream where someone's turned up the gravity way too high but I still have to accomplish things, and they're things I have responsibility for so no one else can do them for me. This time I had to go to school, only I didn't know where the bus stop was or when the bus came, and then I had the name of my homeroom teacher but no idea what building or room she was in and no one was in their offices to tell me. Meanwhile, every bit of this endeavor is made harder by the fact that every step is a herculean effort, much less having to use stairs or walk up a hill. Of which there were, of course, plenty. Then one of my friends offered to help me out, and rode me to the bus stop on the back of his bike, but then had to go do more important things.
HATE.
Lest anyone think these are related to my home situation, I'd say you're probably right, but I think my subconscious is a whiny-ass titty-baby because there really isn't THAT much on my shoulders, damnit.
ETA: As if I had any situation which WASN'T a home situation. Blecch.
EATA: OMFG a really bad grammatical error which made my brain hurt when I saw it has now been fixed.
Saturday, June 27, 2009
10:56AM
It's kind of neat that language has developed just in the last 30 years to where I can say "His family was Indian" and people know I mean "from India," rather than "native American."
9:19AM
How wrong would it be for me to start playing porn in here full blast 24/7 so kids would stop wandering through my room?
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